We’ve all come to know October as Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
I’m about to be 41, and just in my lifetime breast cancer has morphed from something that affected someone you may know to something we ALL see or feel the effects of each and every day whether personally or through the experiences of others. We’ve been taught from a very early age about how important it is to do breast self-exams so we can become familiar with what feels ‘off’ if something were to change.
I’ve signed up for walks, donated to fundraisers, attended seminars and classes. Shop for a cause? Here. Take ALL my money. I’ll wear the ribbons, shout “Save the ta-tas,” and encourage others to do the same. Bonus? I LOVE PINK, and I love feeling like I can be part of something that helps someone who may receive a devastating diagnosis.
I’m wearing pink, see? I’m here for you. I’m saying prayers for you. I want you to know I see you and I hope one day we do get to celebrate the end of these appointments where women (and men) receive the news that changes their lives forever- that they have breast cancer.
What I didn’t realize until recently is that I may not actually be helping as much as I hoped or thought I was.
Not long ago a friend from college bravely let the world know she had been diagnosed with breast cancer. The type of cancer she was facing was aggressive. It was difficult to make respond to treatments and doesn’t boast the most encouraging survival rates. She met her diagnosis with an honesty about how much it sucked. She didn’t sugar coat what she was facing. Her posts and updates were raw and unfiltered, and continued to educate me on the true side of breast cancer that actually needs more awareness.
We all know breast cancer is out there. We know how many people it affects and how to get screened. My friend’s journey has shown me it’s time to take that awareness to the next level. That means we need to “Think before we Pink.”
I’m happy to report my friend has faced her diagnosis, treatment and post treatment reconstruction journey with the same honesty and openness every step of the way. She’s living her life, enjoying every single hilarious moment with her three young children and moving on from it as ‘normally’ as she can. From her I’ve learned:
Cancer sucks. That’s it. It just sucks. There’s no dressing it up, down or all-around. Even in pink. IT SUCKS.
113 people die each day from Stage IV breast cancer.
4% of newly-diagnosed breast cancer patients are Stage IV at their initial diagnosis, and an additional 30% of patients who are diagnosed with early stage breast cancer will eventually metastasize.
ONLY 2-5% of all funds raised for breast cancer is focused on research for those already in Stage IV. Read that one again, y’all.
Stage IV takes Mamas from babies, friends from friends, sisters from sisters, daughters from mamas, wives from husbands.
I got those bullet points from a post on my friend’s Facebook page. I had no idea such a small percentage of funds raised for breast cancer research is focused on helping those who may have the least amount of time to fight. Keep in mind that’s just 2-5% of funds actually donated to these organizations and that doesn’t take into consideration what an incredibly tiny percentage of funds changing hands through all the pink campaigns we see since much of those funds never even make it to a research organization.
From another of her posts I was reminded “Cancer is not always pink ribbons and celebrations of strength. We sometimes feel broken, jinxed, worthless, cursed, weak, heartbroken and tired.”
Make no mistake I’m not grateful that ANYONE has to face something like breast cancer regardless of what stage it is, but I am grateful to my friend and the strong warriors like her who are fighting who use their journey as a tool to teach me more about what it feels like to be in their shoes. I’m grateful she’s patient with people like me who truly mean well, but are still largely uninformed because we haven’t taken the time to learn more about this before it was in a Facebook status of someone we know and love.
So here’s what I’ve learned and would like to pass along to you in case you, like me, had no idea:
If you’re tempted to buy, do, or sell anything ‘for the cure’ or for ‘pink’ but you can’t find out how much of the funds generated by that effort actually make it to a research or support organization that directly impacts those currently in the fight, then you’re actually going to make much more of a difference to just make a direct donation to a worthy organization.
Does the pink item you’re purchasing even make a donation to a worthwhile organization, or is the company producing it doing something solely for ‘awareness?’ (See my statistics above. It’s time to take our awareness efforts to the next level so awareness can ultimately lead to ACTION.
Does the pink item you’re purchasing contain harmful chemicals or substances that may actually be connected to cancer-causing agents? (That one stopped me dead in my tracks. I hadn’t even thought of that as a possibility before.)
I’m not recommending you boycott the pink efforts this October or any month of the year. I’m simply suggesting we take time to be better stewards of our resources so any funds spent or donated have the absolute highest impact possible for the women and men we love who need it most.
My friend has posted about an organization called METAvivor, which works specifically to raise awareness, funds and resources for metastatic breast cancer (MBC.) METAvivor regularly launches campaigns to increase understanding about metastatic breast cancer to help increase funding for research focused on the already-metastized patient, and to advocate for improved benefits and treatments for those living with MBC. Benefits like the need for expedited Social Security and disability procedures for patients or increased rights to ‘try’ new treatments and therapies or even attainable health insurance that will meet the unique needs of their diagnosis.
I’m grateful to know more about METAvivor and am donating directly to the organization this October. I already have pink shirts (plenty of them!) I already have pink ribbons and bracelets and water bottles. What I need now is to know I’m doing anything I can to help someone already in the fight. If you’re interested in helping as well you can visit METAvivor to learn more or click here to be linked directly to the organization’s donation center. Here’s a statistic you can feel good about:
